The uneasiness of equality

I have come to realize that the size-acceptance blogs are making people uncomfortable with the idea that some doctors expect fat patients to starve themselves before getting treated for real problems. I get responses that don't seem to have anything to do with what I actually said, but were more reflective of defending a preconceived idea of fat = unhealthy.

One thing I'd like to address is the notion that I hate thin people. I don't. I don't think that they are better than I am, but I also don't think that they are worse. It saddens me to think of people who are not naturally thin putting themselves through the psychological and physical trauma of dieting to become that way. I don't believe that people who are naturally thin, though, should try to change that about themselves. My husband is tall and slender. He's also very good-looking. His thinness and good looks, however, are not why I am in love with him. He's the most beautiful person I know, on the inside. I've been attracted to all types of people--fat, thin, conventionally pretty, conventionally ugly. For whatever reason, I don't tend to pick up on these things as much as I pick up on their personality. Looks just aren't really important to me.

Here's another thing: I acknowledge that it is uncomfortable to be in the position of power or superiority, and have the validity of the trait that grants you that position to be challenged. If you've built upon the privilege that comes with being thin, and someone suggests that it's equally as valid to be fat, you stand to lose the things you've gained from that thinness. If your relationship, for example, is based on the person's attraction to your thin body, then you have much to fear if your significant other gets on the "fat is okay too" bandwagon. Suddenly, you have competition that you had completely disregarded.

Also, if you are a thin person who has built status by treating fat people like they are lesser beings, you're going to have a great deal to answer for when they become recognized as equals. Your status is definitely going to change. It's been terribly comfortable being able to claim that your discrimination is based on "health", but as the evidence builds that body size is not an indicator of health, you're apt to become uncomfortable.

I'm reminded of the infamous scene in Indiana Jones, where the massively muscular guy with swords is looming menacingly, whisking those swords around like a scary eggbeater carnival ride. Poor scrawny Indy looks like he's about to get his butt kicked, because the assumption is that the power lies with the muscle-bound dude with the swords. Of course, we all know that Indy whips out his pistol and evens the score. It almost seems unfair, but, hey, the sword guy could have avoided the situation by not picking on someone who appears to be powerless!

And that's the lesson, I suppose. If the idea that fat is not necessarily unhealthy makes you uncomfortable, examine your reasons for feeling that way. Is it because you've been acting superior to fat people, and you'll have to eat crow if the new information is true? Is it because you fear that a fat person will now be competition for jobs and relationships? The easy solution is to find something other than cutting others down to make yourself feel good. Build relationships based on qualities other than physical beauty. In other words, live in a humanitarian fashion, and you will achieve status and happiness by being known for your kind and loving nature. If you base your self-esteem on whom you hate, on being superior to others, then you're bound to become unhappy sooner or later. Step out of the competition and let go of your prejudices. You'll be happier.