"But don't you want someone to love you? Aren't you afraid you'll be single your entire life? If you don't lose weight, then don't complain about not having sex!"
Actually, I want to tackle that last part first. I keep seeing accusations that people of the size positive community are "constantly whining that no one will have sex with them." I am completely baffled as to where they are getting this information, because I have yet to see it in any of the blogs or journals of the FA community. In fact, I can't think of a single fat friend of mine who has a problem getting laid. Most of them are happily married or in long term relationships. Some are partnered to fat people, some to thin people, and all combinations inbetween. In fact, I've been acquainted with at least three fat couples who have open relationships, and they do not lack for partners, thick and thin, with which to exercise that openness. I myself am married to a thin man, and we do not lack for a sex life (sorry, mom) (yes, my mom reads my blog).
Yesterday, I requested that readers shower me with comments and photos about their relationships. As of this writing, 21 different people shared their love stories with me. Considering I'm just a little wee blogger who doesn't have the large audience that Shapely Prose enjoys, I think that's a pretty good number--and I expect it to go up! Attraction is different for everyone, and, from what I've seen, it's rarely actually about fat or thin.
My mother's family has a considerable number of large people, from my grandfather, to his siblings, and all sorts of cousins and the like. Every fat person in that family who wants to be married is married, most of them with offspring (I opted out of that, myself). My mother actually takes after HER mom in being average sized, but there's quite a bit of fat in the family.
You see, not everyone finds fat people inherently unattractive. And we aren't sitting around crying into our Ben & Jerry's wondering why we can't get a date. I've personally never lacked for interested parties of all sizes and genders, and the only real obstacle a fat person has is their own anxiety and fear--which is usually the result of shallow, mean people telling us that no one will possibly want us, love us, or sleep with us unless we lose weight.
Given the climate in which fat singles must venture forth into the dating world, it's actually quite amazing that we manage to summon the courage to face potential cruelty and humiliation in order to find the special person that is a good match. Amazing, yes, but as hard as folks try and shoot us down before we've even thought about trying, we do it, and we get laid, loved, and married just as easily as thin people if we have the confidence to respond to signals from those who are interested.